we are miles away.

it's been awhile since i wrote.
the last few posts was simply pictures and little words.

time seemed to have past more quickly than earlier this year, but still it's slower than i ever experienced.

on friday i wrote a post. but i wasn't sure whether i should post it
oh wells

the burn on my hand is starting to heal
hopefully there wont be a scar
dad and elsie seemed to be more concerned about this more than i do
true, a scar on the back of your hand is not a very good sight
but it will remind me things that i learnt but seem to forget in a very daily basis.
it's just that
when you hurt somebody, no matter how hard you apologize or try to fix it. there will always be a scar left behind and there is no way (i mean duh unless you do some laser surgery) the scar will dissappear.

this is what i wrote on friday.
just finished watching caucasian chalk. felt that i have completely wasted 12aud.
which in a way if i convert it, i can get a h&m tshirt or something.

while trying to resist from being bored, i realized that today you seemed to have appeared in the scenes of my brain more often than usual.

this is the one post out of my entire blog i wish that you will really read by chance.
i do not dare to hope, because things between us have blurred into unknown long ago.

your friend asked me a rather strange question yesterday, 'do you miss him?'
and i told him, 'in a way yeh but i wont'

i dont know the reason for that answer. i just thought it'd be the best thing to say, or do i just thought you'd like me to say that.

but today i was missing you
and it came to me that you were the person that brought me to the wonders of the world the imagination that you hated after the day we seperated.

we have both changed. and maybe if we see each other again, it'd be like seeing a stranger.

i wrote so many letters that were left piled on the top of my shelf
i feared that you will trash them before you finish reading them
i feared that you will hate me even more

but what was i supposed to do?
every word you said. everything we've done. every look on your face. replays continuously through my head like motion pictures.

"so much that none of the words in any languages can describe how i feel."




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